Willing to be surprised

Why do you see the speck in your neighbor's eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, "Let me take the speck out of your eye," while the log is in your own eye?

You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor's eye. (Matthew 7:3-5 NRSV)

I heard recently that many Americans have lost their capacity to be surprised. The person surmised three primary cultural shifts have given rise to the tendency to make egregious assumptions about one another, so much so that we have become blinded to the possibility for nuance or subtlety. These are: (1) the constant exposure to media (social or otherwise); (2) the tendency towards over-sensationalizing of stories and (3) the linkage of one's very identity with a position (i.e. a language shift from "I voted for this fill-in-the-blank policy/person" to "I'm a fill-in-the-blank supporter").

Jesus talks about this sort of thing in Matthew 7. The tendency to make assumptions about others is akin to viewing the "specks" I think I see through my own distorted vision. How can I see clearly, for there is a log stuck in my own eye!?! These assumptions (resulting from log-distorted vision) then make it difficult to recognize when someone does not fit my preconceived ideas about them. In that scenario I've lost the capacity to be surprised.

I don't think I'm alone here. I imagine there are a few of us who have preconceived notions about what the "other person" thinks, based on things we've heard them say or the kind of hats they wear or what they drive or where they shop or, or, or. We don't often make much room in our minds for nuance, for variance-even within our own in-groups.

It's easier that way, I'll admit. Makes the world seem more manageable, "I've got them all figured out." But when someone does it to me, I think, "How rude! Boy they are sure making some assumptions!"

What if those of us who have this tendency were to do a little more work on the logs in our own eyes, worrying less about the specks in others? Would we do less blaming? Would our willingness and capacity to be surprised increase? Could I be surprised by unexpected nuance and subtlety? Surprised by outside-the-box-I've-put-them-in ideas?

To be surprised by nuance and subtlety is to be curious about others, particularly those we think we've got all figured out. It is to allow people the courtesy of not labeling them and keeping them at arm's length. In the times we live in, I pray that our capacity and willingness to be pleasantly surprised by one another might increase. I hope we hunger and thirst for this relational righteousness.