Schaffs Celebrate 60 Years of Marriage

SEELEY LAKE – Seeley Lake residents Don and Eileen Schaff celebrate 60 years of marriage Dec. 26. While they agree it may have been the times of separation and reunions during Don's more than 27 years in the Navy that kept them together, they also credit their faith in God, ability to communicate and willingness to give and take in the relationship.

While travelling on the Northern Pacific train in 1954, Don heard Eileen's voice for the first time. Don was in the Navy and had been home on leave to visit his parents in Montana. He was returning to the east coast to get back on his ship. Eileen had been in Portland, Ore. and was on her way back to Valley City, N.D. where she was attending college to become a teacher.

"Here in this dark car on the Northern Pacific on a visit to Montana, is this voice with a very intriguing tone," said Don.

"I was visiting with a bunch of gals up in the Vista Dome," said Eileen. "This gentleman interrupted our conversation to give us a little tidbit of something that he knew about Portugal."

Don knew that when visiting Portugal, people couldn't have matches and they had to have their cigarette lighter licensed. It was the same with soda.

"The government owned all the Coca Cola. If you got a Coca Cola you better have a license to carry it," said Don. "[Eileen] was a geography teacher and I was the smarty who could tell them things that they had not heard before."

After their chance encounter, Eileen and her friends went down to the dining car to get a hot chocolate.

"Mister Smarty decided he was going to pay for our hot chocolate but then when we went to pay for it they charged us too," said Eileen.

Don knew Eileen's name and that she was attending Valley City State College. Because it was a small school, he was able to send her a letter.

"It was through that letter that we found out we both paid for the hot chocolate," said Eileen and laughed. "We started writing back and forth."

Don continued his training with the Navy and Eileen graduated with a teaching certificate and taught fifth grade in Elgin, N.D. They met each other once in Mandan, N.D. but otherwise just wrote letters back and forth.

"What's your favorite seafood or what's your favorite whatever. We were comparing notes," said Don. "I asked if she liked seafood. I was thinking of putting worms on hooks but she didn't know that."

"Or if you liked sports," added Eileen. "He liked fishing and I liked bowling."

After writing back and forth for two years, she flew to New York to spend a few days with him. Don was on board a ship and rented her a hotel room to stay. They went to see various shows including the Rockettes and Sammy Davis Jr.

"When he took me back to the hotel he asked me to marry him and I did," said Eileen.

They drove up to Yonkers and the Justice of the Peace married them Dec. 26, 1956 without the required three-day waiting period. The justice's assistant was their witness.

"My family thought it was humorous," said Don and laughed.

After getting married, they drove to visit Eileen's family in North Dakota and then to visit Don's family in St. Anthony, Idaho. They ended their trip in San Francisco, Calif. where Don went back to work for the Navy and prepared to go to Hawaii. Eileen returned to Elgin to finish out the year teaching. She then moved to Hawaii to be with Don.

They had their first son, Michael in January 1958.

"[Other people] kept telling the story that I had to have gotten pregnant on the ship [she took to Hawaii] because Michael was born two and a half months early," said Eileen. "He only weighed two pounds, 10 ounces."

Thirteen months later they welcomed their daughter Lorrie while they were still in Hawaii.

Two years after moving to Hawaii, Don finished his tour with Navy. They moved to Whitehall, Mont. where Don's parents Heini and Lu lived. They lived there for a couple years during which time they lost Michael, age three.

Don then decided to return to the Navy. They moved to Naval Station Norfolk in Norfolk, Va. for his next tour.

"He would be gone for six months and then be home for six months," said Eileen. "I just had Lorrie then. I would get together with the other Navy wives and children to fill in the time [since I didn't work]. They became my family."

When that tour of duty ended, the Navy sent Don to Naval Postgraduate School in Monterey, Calif. for two years. There he took up meteorology and then they sent him back out on a ship.

In 1965 their son Len was born. They returned to San Diego, Calif. and Don went back out on a ship.

They had their third son Lee in 1967. When he was three months old they left for Guam.

Don worked with the Navy Weather Bureau on Guam.

"While I was out in Guam, I gave a briefing to all the people there and I forecast snow on Christmas Eve," said Don whose forecast was quickly questioned. "I told them I always forecast snow on Christmas Eve so Santa can get in with his toys."

They returned to San Diego in 1970 for five more years. Don was the CEO for the Navy weather for the whole Pacific Coast. His people made the forecasts for all the Navy flights.

"I didn't win all the battles on what the weather was going to be," said Don. "I kept complaining about the equipment they would put on the ships to support my needs for the weather. The way they decided they could quiet me was to move me to Monterey and put me in charge of a [Navy Environmental Display Systems (NEDS)] project to work on getting equipment to support the ships."

Don lived in Monterey from 1975-1980. He was the project leader for NEDS. He was forced to retire in 1980 as a commander after serving 28 years, one more year than was allowable.

Don's parents Heini and Lu moved to Seeley Lake and purchased on the Double Arrow Ranch. When the corner lot on Black Bear and Whitetail Drive went up for sale they asked Don and Eileen if they wanted to purchase it.

"We decided we would buy it as an investment at the time," said Eileen. "We moved here in 1980."

Don worked for Larry Marx and at Pyramid Mountain Lumber until he got a call from the Navy asking him to return to Saudi Arabia as a weatherman. He worked there from 1983-1986.

"I was their American consultant," said Don. "If ever there was something wrong in Saudi Arabia that had something to do with weather or ships going around in the Red Sea, I had to solve the problems."

In 1984, Eileen and the children took a European tour, visiting Don in Saudi Arabia.

After returning from his Saudi Arabia tour, Don went to airline school and worked for Continental Airlines in baggage and then as a ticket counter. He worked for them in Texas, Seattle, Wash. and Great Falls, Mont. He retired after 10 years.

Don said he once met an airline pilot and he told her he worked for the airlines as well.

"She said, 'Oh, what kind of airplane did you fly on?'" said Don. "I said, I didn't say I was a pilot. I was onboard an airplane and they would bring me the bags and then I would pile them here and pile them there. I was a pile-it,"

"He became a jack of all trades with all his different jobs," said Eileen.

Eileen said the biggest challenge for them in the past 60 years was when they lost Michael. Another challenge was adjusting to life with each other after Don returned from long tours.

"We managed to work it out. There was just give and take," said Eileen.

"Whatever our problems they were small," said Don.

The Schaffs participated in many different bowling leagues in their travels. They both still bowl on different leagues in Missoula, Mont.

Don also enjoyed fishing and golfing. They like to play board and card games with their children and grandchildren. The Farming Game, a board game similar to Monopoly, is a family favorite.

When asked how they have stayed married for 60 years, Eileen said, "Maybe it is because we have been separated a lot of times when he was in the military," said Eileen. "Separation was a helpful thing because it was always a joy to see the ship come in."

Don said communication is a key to a long marriage.

"Anytime you are having a problem, half the time it is because you are ignoring the help you have to get back on the wagon again," said Don. "Whoever you are having the problems with, just keep talking."

Eileen said they have gone to church all the time. "I'm sure that helps," said Eileen. "God has kept us straight."

"I never thought of divorce. It's easy now and people don't work at trying to make it happy for both people," continued Eileen. "I have to like some of the things he does. He liked fishing but I never did so I didn't go. But I didn't mind him going. I bowl a lot. He tolerated my bowling too because then he would be home with the kids."

They have two grown granddaughters Carrie and Jackie. The whole family will be together this Christmas and will celebrate their diamond anniversary.

"As a younger man I always said I was going to marry a German girl," said Don. "I didn't know where I was going to find one. I had a chance to find one when I was oversees on a ship. I didn't find a German bride until I got on that train."